Spider-Man Does An “About Face” To Stalking Princess Melita Bonaparte

Her Imperial Highness fell in love with Spider-Man this summer, despite being married to the Burger King. Priests & psychiatrists & paranormal experts have all tried to warn her to avoid a web of her undoing, pleading with her that Spider-Man is a #Marvel comic character that has been turned into a film franchise, but the stubborn Bonaparte Princess will not listen to reason. The Princess told us, “If I wear just the right mask, Spider-Man will fall in love with me, he will want no other. He will think I am a Spider, just like he is.”

The whole problem started when she saw THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 @ #AMC—This peek will show you how it all started…#shareAMC

YOU TUBE OF OFFICIAL TRAILER: THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2

The Most Beautiful Woman in the World, is convinced that she is worthless, unless she can be turned into a Spider.   "I will become a Spider through Force of Will, " the Princess has proclaimed. We tried to tell her that it takes an egg to become a Spider, not a mask.  We fear that the people of Serbia will not take her seriously as their Queen Regnant, if she does not stop this troublesome charade.

The Most Beautiful Woman in the World, is convinced that she is worthless, unless she can be turned into a Spider. “I will become a Spider through Force of Will, ” the Princess has proclaimed. We tried to tell her that it takes an egg to become a Spider, not a mask. We fear that the people of Serbia will not take her seriously as their Queen Regnant, if she does not stop this troublesome charade.

It seems that Princess Melita Bonaparte has mixed reality with fiction.  She is prepared for a career in politics, but not for marriage.  Her thinking is that she will fool the Amazing Spiderman into thinking she is of the same species & that they may make lots of spiders together.  We fear that she has been bitten by the love bug & will end as a black widow if she does not come to her senses.

It seems that Princess Melita Bonaparte has mixed reality with fiction. She is prepared for a career in politics, but not for marriage. Her thinking is that she will fool the Amazing Spider-Man into thinking she is of the same species & that they may make lots of spiders together. We fear that she has been bitten by the love bug & will end as a black widow if she does not come to her senses.

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Princess Melita Bonaparte was enchanted by spiders as a small child, an obsession that she never quite outgrew.

Princess Melita Bonaparte was enchanted by spiders as a small child, an obsession that she never quite outgrew.

The Princess has become so keen on Spider-Man, that she carries symbols of him everywhere she happens to be.

"I cannot bear to let him out of my sight. I have eyes only for Spider-Man."--Princess Melita Bonaparte

“I cannot bear to let him out of my sight. I have eyes only for Spider-Man.”–Princess Melita Bonaparte

Her Imperial Highness remains utterly convinced that the #AMC amazing give-away card was, in reality, Spider-Man using a Sign Language Short Cut that meant that she must wait for him to appear in her life @ just the right moment.

The photograph that caused an Empire to fall out of the reach of the most qualified Monarch in the world.  Princess Melita Bonaparte became utterly devoted to Spider-Man.

The photograph that almost caused an Empire to fall out of the reach of the most qualified Monarch in the world. Princess Melita Bonaparte became utterly devoted to Spider-Man. “I hope some day, The Princess will understand that what I did, by unmasking her, was for for her own good.”–Spider-Man

Even when rational thinking seems to be returning to the Imperial Princess, Spider-Man will appear “When I least expect him, when I have even ceased to think about him, I keep seeing him! I don’t know what to do!” wailed the Princess.

"At first I thought it was possible that this was all in my mind," the Princess admitted, in a rare interview.  "But I step outside the Palace walls, and what do I see?  It is making me crazy!"

“At first I thought it was possible that this was all in my mind,” the Princess admitted, in a rare interview. “But I step outside the Palace walls, and what do I see? It is making me crazy!”

In the final analysis, Spider-Man, non-too-gently literally saw through the machinations of the Imperial Princess, and yanked her mask off, putting an end to her frustrating efforts of constantly trying to claim the climbing web designer, as her very own true love. “I live like a hermit, and am willing to serve in any capacity that Her Imperial Highness needs, but not on a personal level. I place her on a pedistal, and there, she must remain. She can only make a marriage of State with a Royal of equal rank,” tearfully added Spider-Man, “I wish things could be different, but she is not a Spider, no matter how many times she comes to #AMC.”

Sadly, but with no ambiguity, Spider-Man put a stop to Princess Melita Bonaparte's obsession with wanting to become a Spider.  "She must become the Empress of the 21st Century, and I will do all I can to help her in attaining that goal.  But she must find a descendant from Charlemagne & Empress Eudoxia for marriage," explained Spider-Man.

Sadly, but with no ambiguity, Spider-Man put a stop to Princess Melita Bonaparte’s obsession with wanting to become a Spider. “She must become the Empress of the 21st Century, and I will do all I can to help her in attaining that goal. But she must find a descendant of #Charlemagne & Empress #Eudoxia for marriage,” explained Spider-Man.

“I DEMAND TOTAL SILENCE FROM THE QUIET ONES”–Princess Melita Bonaparte

“Noise. Noise. Noise. Everyone makes noise, but no one says anything,” grumped Princess Melita Bonaparte. I heard too much noise today & am in a bad mood. If I am in a bad mood, you need to go into hiding!”

With that, we see that Mt. Vesuvius has put us on notice.

But wait, there’s hope. Her Imperial Highness had a photo-shoot today, and nothing pleases her or calms her down like the flash of light that comes from “Just one more, please, Your Highness.” Her mood lifted considerably. And she permitted Easter to be celebrated.

But, be careful! This happy time might not last too long. She thought she was going to get the part, and that the photo-shoot was being done to announce her being cast in the about-to-be shown film. How can we approach her & tell her that this is another done deal?

Who is willing to die for art?

Poster for The Quiet Ones @ Market/Church Street MUNI Stations, San Francisco.  How do we tell Her Imperial Highness that she did not get the part?

Poster for The Quiet Ones @ Market/Church Street MUNI Stations, San Francisco. How do we tell Her Imperial Highness that she did not get the part?


You Tube From The Quiet Ones

Princess Melita Bonaparte is in a snit. “They clearly indicate that this is based upon real events. The real events were taken directly from my childhood. And I remember when college professors thought it their duty to smoke all during their classes,” coughed the despairing Princess.

“Let me show you who should have been cast in the lead role.”–Princess Melita

"Now, can there be any doubt that I was entitled by my training to play this part?"--Princess Melita Bonaparte

“Now, can there be any doubt that I was entitled by my training to play this part?”–Princess Melita Bonaparte

“I die for art every time a part that should go to me is given to someone else.”–Princess Melita Bonaparte. Her surname seems to make more sense as time goes on…

"My torments in this life can only add more to any role I play," said the Princess

“My torments in this life can only add more to any role I play,” said the Princess

Princess Melita Bonaparte: “I bring real horror to life, and live it on a daily basis.”

"I invent google glasses & they take that away from me. I pick up trash from the streets, and they accuse me of being the one littering.  They take & take & take--I can only suffer..Someday, the Greek government will thank me for my efforts in Restoration of their Monarchy!  Till then, I die for my art."

“I invent google glasses & they take that away from me. I pick up trash from the streets, and they accuse me of being the one littering. They take & take & take–I can only suffer..Someday, the Greek government will thank me for my efforts in Restoration of their Monarchy! Till then, I die for my art.”

ARE YOU DIVERGENT? SAVE YOUR STANDEE FROM BEING TOSSED IN THE DUMPSTER!

Her Imperial Highness, The Princess Melita Bonaparte, has an urgent appeal to make to all DIVERGENTS–Appeal to the Highest Powers to save your beloved DIVERGENT STANDEEE from being tossed into the DUMPSTER! It is bound to happen–that is the sad ‘company policy’ that Her Imperial Highness has learned from her informants.

Princess Melita Bonaparte has always known that she inherited being DIVERGENT from the late Princess Marie Bonaparte.  She studied Freud & then she read Veronica Roth's book to prepare for being thrown alive into the dumpster!  Only you can save the standee from this fate!

Princess Melita Bonaparte has always known that she inherited being DIVERGENT from the late Princess Marie Bonaparte. She studied Freud & then she read Veronica Roth’s book to prepare for being thrown alive into the dumpster! Only you can save the standee from this fate!

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ONLY YOU can help. Princess Melita has done everything she can to help preserve & protect these works of art for your enjoyment, and for the enjoyment of future collectors.

Princess Melita Bonaparte has no hands but yours. Her heart she gives freely, but you must provide her your hands. She is your passionate advocate, your Monarch of Absolute Love.

Be Dauntless, in your support for DIVERGENT!

Princess Melita Bonaparte, now restored to the Imperial Line, read DIVERGENT cover to cover-pleading with theatre managers to save the standee from the Dumpsters.  Can we have a stay of execution?

Princess Melita Bonaparte, now restored to the Imperial Line, read DIVERGENT cover to cover-pleading with theatre managers to save the standee from the Dumpsters. Can we have a stay of execution?

Coming 21 March 2014.

Princess Melita Bonaparte found her brother, Prince Roland Bonaparte II, as part of the DIVERGENT STANDEE.  Single handed, an Army of One, she attempted to preserve & protect this wonderful treasure from ending up in the AMC Dumpster.  She has no hands but yours!

Princess Melita Bonaparte found her brother, Prince Roland Bonaparte II, as part of the DIVERGENT STANDEE. Single handed, an Army of One, she attempted to preserve & protect this wonderful treasure from ending up in the AMC Dumpster. She has no hands but yours!


You Tube Trailer For DIVERGENT

Happy St. Patrick’s Day From Princess Melita Bonaparte

Her Imperial Highness, The Princess Melita Bonaparte, wishes all a Happy St. Patrick’s Day. She appeals for those who are falsely imprisoned, that they may find justice.

Princess Melita Bonaparte pleads for those in jail who have no head, no voice of their own..."Such needless suffering must end," she appeals to the world.

Princess Melita Bonaparte pleads for those in jail who have no head, no voice of their own…”Such needless suffering must end,” she appeals to the world.

In prayerful mode, the Princess assists those in prisons with her spiritual benefits, endless prayer & advocacy.

In prayerful mode, the Princess assists those in prisons with her spiritual benefits, endless prayer & advocacy.

“Let us come together to bring better schools & a better future for our people. Prisons are the result of a society that has been mislead by following the Values of Wal-Mart & other forms of corporate greed. No one should be denied educational or medical benefits & no one should have to depend upon being named ‘Employee of the Month’ as their only source of validation. Parking lots, where no one walks to the stores , are not the answer. We must seek simpler ways to live that encourage education, appreciation of art & literature & no more throwing away of film promotional art into dumpsters. Let the creative spirit of art thrive, and become a benefit for all communities. Let us send a light out to the rest of the world of this special day!”

Hollywood With The Last Bonaparte-Now Restored to the Imperial Line!

Her Imperial Highness, The Princess Melita Bonaparte has stolen the famous quotation from her Grandmother, Princess Marie Bonaparte: “If anyone writes the story of my life, it should be called THE LAST BONAPARTE, for I am the last. My cousins of the Imperial Line are only Napoléons.” For best adapted quotation, the Oscar clearly went to the Only Bonaparte, Princess Melita.

Winner Takes All–The Imperial Glory Went to Princess Melita

Princess Melita, still in deep depression ever since learning that the 'standee' for Paranormal Activities was tossed into the AMC dumpster, went on a popcorn binge eating spree--unable to complete her acceptance speech.  The Princess mourns the loss of all art.

Princess Melita, still in deep depression ever since learning that the ‘standee’ for Paranormal Activities was tossed into the AMC dumpster, went on a popcorn binge eating spree–unable to complete her acceptance speech. The Princess mourns the loss of all art.

Hollywood will never be the same for Princess Melita Bonaparte…

"After learning about how 'standee' art is tossed into dumpsters, life is just not the same.  Hollywood is being thrown away instead of cherished," mourns Her Imperial Highness.

“After learning about how ‘standee’ art is tossed into dumpsters, life is just not the same. Hollywood is being thrown away instead of being cherished,” mourns Her Imperial Highness.

“The least AMC & other mulitplex theatre outlets could do is to develop a raffle system to benefit appropriate charities. These items are culturally important,” the Princess tearfully explained.

Dedicated To Patrick Stewart–All About XXXing Film Fans

X-MEN X-ALia X-Cel X-cuse X-am X-Pire X-cellent X-crement X-citing???

It’s another X-Men film. Not Madam X? I’m sorry!

Her Imperial Highness continues to show her devotion to the art of film promotional 'standees' & to Patrick Stewat, to whom she dedicates her Bonaparte fortune.  She likes to X-periment with every possibility in life.

Her Imperial Highness continues to show her devotion to the art of film promotional ‘standees’ & to Patrick Stewat, to whom she dedicates her Bonaparte fortune. She likes to X-periment with every possibility in life.

YOU TUBE TRAILER OF X-MEN DAYS OF FUTURE PAST

The casting error of omitting Her Imperial Highness, The Princess Melita Bonaparte, becomes evident very quickly. She brings a special presence & value that cannot be explained or denied. She longs to be placed into a dumpster, next to her film idols & professional peers. For her next film: THE PERFECTION OF RUIN–which will be dedicated to Patrick Stewart.

When casting directors & studios understand that people are coming to see her, they will stop calling about using her car. Princess Melita Bonaparte is tireless in her efforts to promote films & those who work in them. She believes that her future is in the stars…