GOD HELP YOU!

If you are in a situation where you have signed papers & made arrangements to have “pre-tax income” deducted from your paycheck to have a prepaid, account for bus service in San Francisco, you need all the help you can get.

The telephone numbers on the back of the Clipper Card are for finger exercise & dexterity testing. After you get beyond the menu items (no, not food menu, the OTHER way that word is used these days!), after you have aged a bit more, gotten moldy & collected a bit of dust, and need another shower, finally, you will get a human who will tell you that there is nothing that the folks at Clipper Card can do for you, that you must contact an entity called Wage Works.

I looked at the back of my card without benefit of adult beverages, and it does have the words “Customer Service” imprinted in blue, a sort of pretty blue.

Good colour choice, because you will be singing the blues, once you get disconnected from Clipper Card, especially if it’s on a 4th of July weekend. The payment that is supposed to be lodged into your account is transmitted

Her Serene Highness, The Princess Melita Bonaparte, has bestowed upon Clipper Card, "Worst Case Scenario Since Waterloo Award."

Her Serene Highness, The Princess Melita Bonaparte, has bestowed upon Clipper Card, “Worst Case Scenario Since Waterloo Award.”

to some part of the Twilight Zone that does not have a ZIP Code, and you get accused of insubordination for attempting to find out why these things happen. It takes all the powers of Heaven & Earth to get things back together when this Humpty Dumpty falls apart. You end up a stronger person, ready to accept either your own reality show, The White House, or, if you are like me, you still thirst for Monarchy, in an Absolute sense….Just be patient. Someday, they will be like Pan Am.

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